Emotional intelligence (EI) refers to the ability to perceive, control and evaluate emotions. According to some researchers, emotional intelligence can be learned and strengthened, while according to some others, it is an inborn characteristic.
Are you emotionally intelligent?
Here are 10 of the most important traits of people with high emotional intelligence:
1) Self-awareness
It's a very important trait that, unfortunately, many people lack. However, people with high emotional intelligence are aware of their advantages and their flaws. They won't overrate themselves but they won't underestimate themselves either; they appreciate the fact that they still have to learn things. People with high emotional intelligence aren't afraid of their weaknesses.
2) Optimism
People with high emotional intelligence tend to focus on the positive aspects of life. This doesn't mean that they don't care about the bad news, but that they consciously decide not to spend a lot of their time and energy focusing on problems. Rather, they look at the bright side of a situation and look for solutions to a problem. These people focus on what they are able to do and that which is within their control.
3) Curiosity
Curiosity is one of the most common traits that people with high emotional intelligence have. They are curious about everything, but, especially, about people they don't know. They love meeting new people or places and learning new things about life. They also naturally tend to ask lots of questions after they have been introduced to someone. That's because they have a certain degree of empathy, one of the main components of emotional intelligence.
4) Understanding
Empathy helps people with high emotional intelligence to become the best friends. That's because they can truly understand other people's problems. They usually tune into other people’s emotions and can adapt to unspoken social cues. They can also see the interpersonal interactions within groups and larger organizations.
5) Accuracy
All people experience emotions, but it is a select few who can accurately identify them as they occur. Our research shows that only 36 per cent of people can do this, which is problematic because unlabeled emotions often go misunderstood, which leads to irrational choices and counterproductive actions. People with high emotional intelligence have a robust emotional vocabulary, because they master their emotions.
6) Presence of mind
This means that people with high emotional intelligence don't take fear so seriously. On the contrary, they understand that fear is something normal, but they need to let it pass. Fear is just a way for your mind to make you consider what it is that is going on, so keep it in check. One shouldn't be reckless, however they should reconsider their fears and try to face them. And that's what emotionally intelligent people do.
7) Motivation
People with a high emotional intelligence are willing to defer immediate results for long-term success. They are highly productive, love a challenge, and are effective in whatever they do. On the contrary, they hate being bored, so they are constantly trying to have something that keeps them motivated. This proves that IQ alone is not enough for a person to succeed in his life.
8) Emotional Strength
Emotionally intelligent people are familiar with emotions, including the difficult ones. They recognize when they are anxious or exhausted and put off important decisions until they are calmer and better rested. Those with high emotional intelligence know to allow for difficult emotions and accept them as a part of life. Allowing negative feelings to surface fully into awareness, with acceptance and non-judgment, supports self-knowledge and an enhanced sense of purpose.
9) Calmness
Emotionally intelligent people don’t obsess with future events outside of their control. They are comfortable living in a world that doesn’t come with a crystal ball, because life is meant to be an exciting adventure (not a scripted routine). They are ok with their presence and past and they can't wait to face the future.
10) Listening skills
Most people fall into the habit of thinking of a response, while others are speaking instead of actively listening. Emotionally strong leaders avoid that trap, realizing that they need to understand not only the content of what others are saying, but also pick up the feelings behind the words that are being spoken. The emotions behind the words are often more important than the words spoken. It is only when those emotions are acknowledged that people feel that they are being heard. Often complaints are about situations that leaders can do little to change. People are often aware of that, but still have the need to feel heard.
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https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-personality-analyst/200909/what-emotional-intelligence-is-and-is-not
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