Michelle Thomas is a young woman who enjoys life to its fullest. When she meets a man on an online dating platform, it leads to a date with her chat partner named Simon. The two spend a wonderful evening together, laughing and having good conversation over a delicious dinner.
Facebook/MichelleThomas
Michelle is in seventh heaven! On the following evening she receives a message from her Simon. And her 7th heaven falls to the devastating ground of reality. The supposedly charming date writes her THIS:
Instagram/msmthomas
“Hey Michelle, sorry been super busy at work today hun.
Thanks for a wonderful evening last night. I really enjoyed your company and actually adore you. You’re cheeky and funny and just the sort of girl I would love to go out with if only my body and mind would let me. But I fear it won’t.
I’m not going to bulls–t you… I f–king adore you Michelle and I think you’re the prettiest looking girl I’ve ever met. But my mind gets turned on my someone slimmer.
Shallow? It’s not meant to be. It’s the same reaction you get when you read a great author or see an amazing image, or listen to a piece of music you love, it has that instant reaction in you that makes you crave more.
So whilst I am hugely turned on by your mind, your face, your personality (and God…I really, really am), I can’t say the same about your figure. So I can sit there and flirt and have the most incredibly fun evening, but I have this awful feeling that when we got undressed my body would let me down. I don’t want that to happen baby. I don’t want to be lying there next to you, and you asking me why I’m not hard.
There are certain triggers that fire my imagination into life and your wit and intelligence are the beginning of that process which would inevitably end up in the bedroom. With just one result….
I’m so disappointed in myself Michelle because I’ve genuinely not felt this way about anyone in ages, but I’m trying to be honest with you without sounding like a total knobhead.
We could be amazing friends, we could flirt and joke and adore each other and… f–k me… I would marry you like a shot if you were a slip of a girl because what you have in that mind of yours is utterly unique, and I really really love it.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m trying to avoid bigger pain in the future by telling you now so we don’t have to go through that embarrassment. I’m a man… With all the red hot lusts of a man and all the failings of a man and I’m sure of my own body and its needs. Please try and forgive me. I adore you xx”
But how Michelle Thomas, the oh-so-creepily-addressed object of worship, responds to this message is simply brilliant! Read it for yourself:
Facebook/MichelleThomas
“Dear Man I Met On Tinder.
I was on another date when I received your message. He returned from the loo to find me in a flood of tears. He was lovely, but baffled, and hasn’t been in touch since, funnily enough.
You don’t have to fancy me. We all have a good friend who we look at ruefully and think “you’re lovely, but you just don’t tickle my pickle”. We wish we were attracted to them, but our bodies and our brains don’t work like that. And that’s fine.
What isn’t fine is the fact that, after a few hours in my company, you took the time to write this utterly uncalled-for message. It’s nothing short of sadistic. Your tone is saccharine and condescending, but the forensic detail in which you express your disgust at my body is truly grotesque. The only possible objective for writing it is to wound me.
And I’m ashamed to say, for a few moments, it worked. You stirred a dormant fear that every woman who was ever a teenage girl has – that it doesn’t matter how funny you are, how clever, how kind, how passionate, how loyal, how determined or adventurous or vibrant – if you’re a stone overweight, no one will ever find you desirable.
I like the way I look. I don’t look like Charlize Theron, and that’s fine – I look like me, and I like myself (I’m sure I’d like Charlize Theron, too if I ever met her. I hear good things).
You may think are all my profile pictures are “FGASs” (That’s Fat Girl Angle Shots – pictures from angles that slim and flatter the girl. Because men only ever use candid, brutally-lit, unfiltered pics). But I think they’re a fair representation. And I’m pretty upfront about who I am: I describe myself as a woman who loves pizza, and include links to myInstagram page, where I have the #everybodysready bikini shots I took on my 30th birthday. I like to think I come across as a confident, happy woman. But could this be the very reason you have targeted me? Did you see me and think “She has far too high an opinion of herself, she needs bringing down a peg or two”? I have to ask – we all know the internet is a dangerous place to be a woman with opinions (I discovered this first hand when I ventured a response to those obnoxious bloody adverts).
I showed your message to friends who expressed shock, horror, embarrassment on your behalf, and a desire to cause you actual physical harm. One male friend told me I have a lovely bottom “if unmarriageable”. I laughed with them. Then I cried in my Slimming World group. That’s right! Slimming World! You see, I already KNOW that I’m overweight. I can tell you exactly how overweight I am – 20 pounds. I’ve already lost 15, and I’ve a stone and a half to go. I’m happy with that. I will get rid of it, safely and healthily. Does that mean that I can’t love and enjoy my body now? F** no.*
I’ll never see or hear from you again (you may feel the need to respond to this blog. Please don’t. There’s nothing you can say that will make me think that you’re not a disgrace to your gender).
What truly concerns me, the real reason I’m responding so publicly, is the fact that you have a 13 year old daughter. A talented illustrator, who collects Manga comics and wants to visit Japan as soon as possible.
I want you to encourage your daughter to love, enjoy, and care for her body. It belongs to her and only her. Praise her intellect, and her creativity. Push her to push herself and to be fearless. Give her the tools to develop a bomb-proof sense of self-esteem so that if (I’ll be kind. I’ll say “if”.) the time comes that a small, unhappy man attempts to corrode it, she can respond as I do now.
Simon.
Kiss.
My.
Exquisitely.
Unmarriagable.
Arse.
P.S. “Slip of a girl”? CHRIST ALIVE, that’s creepy.
P.P.S. You’re not 5’11”
Wow. This exchange makes you really speechless.
Facebook/MichelleThomas
It is simply brilliant how this confident young woman answers and how she defends her body - or, well, maybe man just wanted to be honest and express his feelings!? The story of this botched romance has split opinions in the social media stratosphere.
When you want to participate in this opinion-splitting story then share it with everyone you know!
Source: Hefty via Idealist Revolution
I do not see anything wrong with the Body of Michelle Thomas...I see her is Sexy and normal. I know maybe when we habe overweight we could have health problems, and we need to loose weight maybe. But apart of this, the Body of Michelle looks to me good.
ReplyDeleteI do not see the viral coments, etc. for this???
why don´t make viral comments about people who give their lives in problematic countries where the life value nothing?
why don´t we make viral people who are real Heroes and living in a countries where are wars, brutality with shit religions sistems , etc.???
why we don´t make viral the work of Medicins Sains Frontiers (Doctors without borders).
But we are , we like to see this kind of viral (a woman with a normal body who search in a website for romance, etc.????) what kind of society we are???
Where we have our Mature????
Some of her message to him was good, but she totally misunderstands his motives. He is NOT trying to hurt her. He is not sadistic. He had a choice. He could have said nothing and just treated her as a friend, and then she would have been left wondering forever why he didn't want more than that. Or he could have just told her the truth. He chose the latter out of respect for her right to know, but unfortunately he should have known that it's too touchy a subject to be honest about with women.
ReplyDeleteReally, if you think his motives were pure, you're an idiot. The tone is beyond patronising. His choice of words is deliberately cruel. He could have easily said, 'you're just not what I'm looking for' but no. He chose to pick apart something that is an issue for most women. If you really think this is ok, do the world a favour and go play in the traffic.
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DeleteThe tone fair enough can sound patronising to you but how do you know that he deliberately wanted to be cruel. This writing doesn't prove he had bad intentions. Right, 'you're just not what I'm looking for' would be the kind of thing I'd choose to say to someone just to be more polite but that wouldn't leave a woman wondering and wanting to know why? I don't think he means to hurt her at all. What I'd think is that perhaps while he believes he's just being honest, subconsciously this makes him feel good for himself by expressing that he needs something even more 'perfect' than that; presenting himself as very 'high' status. The man is lacking some insight about women...
DeleteThe only reason anyone would write something like this is to excuse themselves from their own wrong feelings. No. He doesn't have to like her/date her/call her again. There was absolutely no reason to be so sugary AND there was even less than no reason to say anything about her weight.
DeleteAt the end of this article was an advert for loosing weight lol.
ReplyDeleteSeems like that bitch mad at first she was in love, she didn't have to. Get so mad she could have just slimmed down for the man., she is a dumb fuck.
ReplyDeleteCan you say that in English - none besides you speak retardese.....
DeleteI think this girl had an amazing response to the many men & women out there who believe relationships filled with love, intimacy & passion are based on the physical appearances of the two.!!! No, it doesn't work like that! I wish more teenagers see this and try to empower their self esteem. :)
ReplyDeleteI think she understood perfectly what crap he was spilling out of his stupid mouth. It is guys like him with ugly comments like that the reason why young teens starve themselves. and trying or not he went into way over the top on the discription of why their relationship would not go further. what part of his whole script was helpful to her or even remotely kind? It seems to me she wasn't really giving him much thought at all really she was already on a new date. Men think in simple terms so I'll give you a hint here ok? Men have to learn a simple rule when dealing with woman. If what you are going to say is in anyway not nice do not open your dumb ass mouth and say it. She should be proud of herself she responded perfectly and better than he deserved.
ReplyDeleteDelete - See more at: http://www.thinkinghumanity.com/2015/10/she-had-the-time-of-her-life-on-a-tinder-date-until-she-received-a-shattering-text-her-reaction-has-gone-viral.html?showComment=1451245356980#c4107558979742409420
This is also why women refuse to date ever again after meeting men with this mentality. I say women are better off alone and happy than be with a so called man who criticizes her looks; when the man is not perfect himself.
ReplyDeleteThis is also why women refuse to date ever again after meeting men with this mentality. I say women are better off alone and happy than be with a so called man who criticizes her looks; when the man is not perfect himself.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that every woman in this comments section attacking him for being honest has their bedroom walls decorated with posters of Danny DeVito and Gabriel Iglasias, right?
ReplyDeleteYou're missing the point. Cruelty is never for 'no reason' and it never has anything to do with the object of that cruelty. This guy has a personal problem that he tried to hand to her. She did what every healthy woman would do... she handed it right back.
DeleteThis guy is actually mentally ill. He is egocentric and narcissistic. She was his prey that day. He attacked her looks to make himself feel more than her, more than she is. She may see him in the future with some "slip of a girl" meaning small in mind and body and easier for him to manipulate and control and abuse. Hopefully he never finds a woman.
ReplyDeleteShe is a little overweight, sure, but it's how she acts and how she embraces that and her style that make her attractive and sexy. I actually feel very attracted to her after reading all the story, she really is a keeper.
ReplyDeletehe let her know politely what he think of her and he was honest. He did not say no one will love her. I see nothing wrong. pofff!
ReplyDeleteTo be polite you need to filter out anything that can be hurtful.
DeleteHis detailed description of precisely how turned off he is about her body is anything but polite.
I'm not sure he was trying to be intentionally cruel, but his words definitely weren't polite.
I personally think that the guy had tried "too hard" to describe what turn him off (the body). He could do in a more gentleman way as not to hurt anyone or encourage her to do more exercise. He was too blunt and immature to me.
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ReplyDeleteI do think (in his weird inflated vision of himself) his intentions in writing this creepy piece of drivel were actually honorable. He probably thought he was doing you a massive favour, and likely your admission that you are already at slimming world he will no doubt take as a cast iron that he was right in sending that horrific text.("Ah see, shes at a diet club and everyfin guv")
ReplyDeleteHe talks so much about your mind, its clear he was intimidated by your intelligence. I bet he read that piece of snivelling, skin crawling vom out to his equally creepy flatmate 100 times and tweaked it between them till it was just "perfect". He had no problems with your weight is my take on it. He couldn't deal with a feisty, outspoken, clever lady and this was his misogynistic way of bringing you down a peg or two.. I'm delighted its done the opposite and him being publicly shamed may make other 'anti chub lotharios' think twice before listing off their dates physical flaws in such a galling display of callous sexism.
I'm married now myself, to a nice man, the complete opposite of this ass hole, but have 4 nieces who will soon be of the age that they may encounter such blatant fuckwittery -and that is terrifying to me. I plan to purchase Caitlyn Morans 'How to be a woman' for each of them.
So well done you. And kudos on the height comment. Ha ha.
PS you are beautiful.
I think his message was too flowery and long-drawn-out. He could have expressed himself more succinctly. I'm also not sure what the point of writing that was - he's never seeing her again so he could just spin one of those insincere lines everyone uses "There's no chemistry" or "the physical attraction is not there" and avoided breaking her down like that.
ReplyDeleteHer reply came across as overly resentful and bitter. So this guy didn't find you attractive... big deal. There are plenty of guys out there who wouldn't have that problem, so just date one of them instead. I also don't see why she felt the need to point out she was on another date when she read his reply. Was she trying to prove to him that she had value because a lot of men want to date her?
Lastly, for the commenters saying that her weight is not an issue... she admits herself that she feels 15-20 lbs overweight and is on a weight-loss program to address it. I agree with her assessment that she'd look better with less weight, and I admire her for doing something to move in that direction instead of having the attitude that "I'm perfect as I am, everyone should just suck it". She had the right attitude and is trying to improve herself, and that's how you get ahead in life. Better than being unhappy with your weight and living in denial, trying to convince yourself that you feel happy (when you know deep down you are not) instead of doing something positive about it.
Advice to each: Forget it and move on.
ReplyDeleteHe most likely lied about having a 13 yr old daughter. That's one thing you can believe about him to be true!
ReplyDeleteWow, I think first of all that she doesnt seems to be overweight at all, she just looks like a healthy young woman. Secondly, whether someone feels attracted to another can be very personal. And despite this mans superficial reason for not feeling attracted, he should be at least man enough to make a woman feel better about herself, not worse. All he does is making himself feel better, because probabily he is insecure himself. And he saw her pictures, so how stupid is he, if he likes skinny girls why go on a date with her in the first place. How sadistic to then offend the woman, with the excuse of just being honest.
ReplyDeleteYou and Simon sound like you may have some things in common?
ReplyDeleteit happend to me to nto be attracted by someone beautiful, to which standard..., but hey attraction is attraction
ReplyDeleteWho cars what this man thinks of you. He is nasty peice of work so well rid.
ReplyDeleteGOOD
ReplyDeleteThat's life, baby! I have not been sitting in social networks for dating such as Tinder or Bumble for a long time. But when I read such stories I have fun, honestly.
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