Did you know that the more independent you are, the harder it is for you to be in a long term relationship? Well, that's sad but true. There are probably many reasons this happens, but it seems that independent people are already so good at working on themselves and digging through their own baggage, that often it takes a relationship to really push them out of their comfort zone.
So here are 6 reasons why independent people often find it hard to be in a serious relationship:
1) They’d rather be alone than be with the wrong person.
They know better than to commit out of the fear of being alone with themselves – or worse, whatever social implications that may come with. So they often tend to become hyper-analytical of what would make someone the “right” person. They know that compatibility is as much of a science as it is an art – it’s half inherent chemistry, and half the decision to cultivate love and caring. That is to say: it takes a lot to determine whether or not you really are suited for someone.
2) They are more suspicious.
When you think too much, there’s a possibility that you’ll start thinking bad things. Sometimes intelligent people fill their minds with insecurities. They can’t easily be fooled, but that’s exactly because they’re afraid of being fooled! They are too careful when they pick a partner or even a friend and that’s why they end up being alone for long periods of time. Of course, being too naive isn’t good either, but being too suspicious can only trouble you more.
3) They love travelling alone. All the time.
Traveling as a couple can be stressful, and some people just like traveling alone. If you’re in a couple made up of two independent people, you’ll appreciate getting to travel by yourself. It will give you a chance to recharge, you and your partner an opportunity to miss each other, and lots to talk about when you get back.
4) They do not find their happiness in anything that comes easily to them.
Independent people find their happiness in perseverance and commitment to something they can work on and grow with. While this seems like a positive mindset to have, it can backfire when it affects how they choose their romantic partners. A relationship only works if you’re willing to commit even when it’s hard, not choose it because it’s hard.
5) They tend to attract the "needy" ones.
Independent people usually attract the ones that need help, because they inspire them and they actually help them. Independent people have that amazing aura of confidence around them, that’s why weaker people are attracted to them. It is perfectly fine to help others to overcome their problems, to support and encourage your partner as long as you are okay with it.
6) They overestimate their ability to change others.
An independent person gives chances to individuals others would just write off. Of course, this makes them very popular with said ‘deplorable’ individuals. Ultimately, though, this usually leads to frustration for both individuals; just because someone is strong doesn’t make them a great life coach.
Written by Katerina Papakyriakopoulou
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