Everything seems a lot more difficult when you’re facing high-functioning depression ― relationships included.
According to experts, the condition isn’t noticeable to the majority of people since those who experience it tend to hide it well. This arguably makes the disorder hard for partners to recognize and the people who face it hesitant to talk about it in the first place.
The symptoms are similar those of depression, including irritability and sorrow. However, the average observer wouldn’t necessarily notice them based on how the sufferer is behaving.
Fortunately, knowledge is power. Education about mental health issues can help in understanding the disorders a little bit better. Moreover, in a world where only 25% of people who suffer from mental illnesses feel like others are sympathetic to them, compassion can go a long way.
Some people have shared some truths about how they wished their loved ones understood more about high-functioning depression. Here’s what they said:
1. High-functioning depression sucks all their energy.
“I wish my fiancé understood that some days, I can’t turn my depression off. I can’t always just get out of bed immediately and take on the day like he does. I need to motivate and really push myself to do so, and it takes a great amount of effort.” ―Lindsey Diamond
2. Just because the condition is difficult to be noticed doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
“I may seem happy and I am able to joke, but when I get home, the mask comes off and I cannot function beyond basic necessities ... Everything is difficult.” ―Theresa Allen
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3. Sometimes it becomes an obstacle for any social gathering.
“[I want them to] stop demanding that I attend every party with them because they need to know I want some time alone.” ―Samra Suleman
4. Sometimes it helps to stay distracted.
“For me, it is having to be busy at all times. The point is to mentally exhaust myself so the bad thoughts don’t creep in as I lie in bed each night.” ―Katherine Deubner
5. It's noone's fault.
“I wish he knew when I’m at my low points it’s no ones fault. Sometimes I’m just sad, sometimes I just need to lay in bed, sometimes I need him to do what I normally do around the house.” ―Sandra Ringle
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6. There’s usually no explanation for why it’s happening.
“I wish my partner knew that there is rarely (if ever) a specific ‘cause’ to my depressed states. I do not have a tangible answer to the question, ‘What’s wrong?’” ―Beranger LeFranc
7. It's like an internal battle.
“Basically it’s like an argument between my heart and my brain. While I’m crying my heart out my brain thinks, ‘What the hell is wrong with you. Look at how great things are!’ And my heart says, ‘If you can’t figure it out, we’re going to die.’ That’s what it seems like when for no obvious reason I find myself in a total emotional meltdown.” ―Michael Aldieri
8. People who suffer from high-functioning depression are unintentionally isolated.
“I wish he knew that I don’t want to shut him out, I just don’t know how to let him in.” ―Liv Kerr
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9. Affectionate gestures can go a long way.
“I just need to be held and then left alone for a while. What I’m feeling is as if I’m underwater and my lungs can’t get air.” ―Sandra Ringle
10. It's not something that can be controlled.
“I wish my partner understood how little control I really have over my depression. I can do every little thing correctly, eating right, taking care of myself, exercising daily, centering my mind with yoga and all it takes is one trigger to undo all that work.” ―Emily Maia
11. There's nothing you do wrong.
“I wish he knew that even though he is the most amazing man I’ve ever met, there is a piece of me that is broken and it has nothing to do with him. He could make me smile every day, but as soon as that switch gets flipped I will have a really hard time being able to pump the brakes on my depression and anxiety.” ―Emily Thomas
12. Your support is critical.
“I wish he knew how overwhelming being sad during a depressive state is ... sometimes it would be really nice to get a hug, instead of just the cold shoulder and being ignored because it is difficult to understand. Support is worth more than words could ever say.” ―Avarie Downs
The bottom line is this: Don’t abandon someone with high-functioning depression. Your love can mean everything to them.
Some responses have been lightly edited or condensed for clarity.
Based on: Huffington Post
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