Are you in love or just obsessed?
Yes, when you are in love you can be a bit obsessed with your significant other, but sometimes when you just can't get them out of your head, it's not true love, it's just an obsession.
When you can't tell these two feelings apart, you can get into a relationship really fast, ignoring all the signs that warn you not to.
Distinguish infatuation from love is fundamental to find the right partner.
Let's go through 7 critical differences between love and obsession.
7 Ways To Distinguish True Love From Just A Crush
1. Illusion VS Reality
When you love someone, you know that they aren't perfect, flawless beings. You know their flaws and make each and every one of the reasons to love them. True love means acceptance.
On the other hand, when you're infatuated, you tend to create a perfect image in your mind, that has nothing to do with reality.
2. Instability VS Balance
Having a crush can evolve to be an emotional hell, one moment you're flying so high, next one you're crying. Everything is about how your crush makes you feel. Just one smile makes your day, yet if they ignore you you're ready to die of sadness.
Love is totally different. You don't feel insecure or desperate, you don't beg for attention or approval. You have the confidence of feeling loved even when you're not together. After all, when someone loves you, you can tell from how they treat you.
3. Now VS Forever
True love lasts forever. It has nothing to do with being in a relationship. When you love someone, even if you break up, love doesn't die. When you are genuinely in love, you can't wait to plan your future together; you daydream about what is yet to come and make plans for your shared life.
True love means sacrificing. It's not that you can't live without the other, it's that you don't want to. That's why couples compromise and put their egos aside.
Infatuation is all about now. There are sacrifices too, but usually unreasonable ones. You put yourself second just to be able to be around your crush.
4. Jealousy VS Trust
Yes, we all are jealous of our significant others; after all, it's our fear not to lose them. But, when you're genuinely in love, you can trust your partner.
When you're obsessed, you can't even stand the idea of them flirting with others, no matter if you're dating or not. Obsession comes with a need to own the other; they are "yours" and only.
5. Present VS Future
One other fundamental difference between love and infatuation is that love grows with time. Infatuation starts suddenly with no apparent reason without even, sometimes, knowing the person. Love, on the contrary, is deep and gets more profound as time goes by, you are falling more for your significant other.
6. Inferiority syndrome
While being in love means that you find your partner equal to you, when you are infatuated, you believe that your crush is something like a god. You are blind to all their flaws. They are no ordinary human beings, and they are exceptional. You see in them characteristics that you would like to have, and you tend to imitate their behavior.
7. Love makes us better
Having a crush can be consuming. You are in an emotional rollercoaster that you can't tame. You can't sleep, you can't eat, it's like everything is about your crush.
Love puts you back together. Love helps you find yourself, chase your dreams, and believe in you. Love is inspiring. It makes you want to be better every day, evolving constantly to be a better version of you. Love makes you bloom.
So, is it love or crush?
Admit it. You actually knew from the beginning whether you are in love or infatuated.
To avoid your crush becoming an obsession, try to change a bit your everyday life, find a new hobby, spend quality time with friends and family and avoid putting so much effort into being constantly around your subject of desire. Time is, indeed, the best doctor.
If you have fears that it's a bit late for you to free yourself, it's better to seek professional help.
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