All human beings are deserving of basic respect and human dignity, that goes without saying. Most of us also wish to obtain a level of respect from those around us going beyond simple basic decency. We want to be treated as if we have solid worth, as if we have something special to be appreciated for.
What many people don't realise is that respect, true respect, can not be bought or forced. Real respect can only come from inside another on their own volition. Real respect from others comes from them respecting you as a person, not for what you have or what you can offer them in return.
So how is that real respect created in others?
Respect yourself first.
Some people will always treat us badly no matter what, and many who treat us well will leave us when times get tough or are actively looking for us to fail when they are behind our backs. Real respect can only be manufactured by first respecting yourself. This is the only true source of respect.
Even if we have all the world can give, some people without dignity and filled with anger and envy will never respect us because they can't respect themselves. That is why respecting yourself first and foremost is the key to our own dignity and self-worth.
So can we win respect and establish ourselves?
We demonstrate our self-respect through our actions, by respecting others, and refusing to be treated disrespectfully by others. That means that we refuse to stand by those who wrong us, while of course making allowance for their normal human frailties.
It means recognising our own self-worth as a human being regardless of what we may have or may not have achieved in life, because we know self-respect doesn't come form a series of accomplishments but from our own integrity.
As a self-respecting human being, we also recognise our faults but realise that does not eliminate our true character and that we can move on while understanding our frailties.
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